Does Transformers Stand the Test of Time?

Michael Bay’s take on Optimus Prime met my eyes with explosive enthusiasm as a child. But does my opinion transform at all after re-visiting it nearly twenty years later? Let’s roll out to find out.

Spoiler Alert: If you lived out in Cybertron over the past nineteen years and missed the memo on “Transformers”, but still want to watch it without spoilers, you can scroll down to the Hundred Tomatoes “verdict” section. You can also do that if you hate this whole reading thing, and/or if you prefer the destination over the journey. Whatever floats your boat.

Growing up, I was inundated and infatuated with content involving intergalactic robots that could shape shift. It didn’t matter whether they morphed into cars, or animals like they did in the spin off show “Beast Wars” (whose theme song still lives in my head rent free). As long as epic battles ensued with epic music, you could guarantee that I would glue my eyes to the family room TV for hours on end as my Mom went crazy trying to tell the difference between the two warring factions. Don’t even get her started on the toys.

Fun fact: in Canada, they called the show “Beasties” instead of “Beast Wars”, so for the longest time, that’s what I remembered it as. Until years later when I moved to the United States. My friends thought I took crazy pills on the daily when I told them that growing up, I watched a show called “Beasties”.

It turns out that Canadian broadcast standards and children’s television guidelines at the time discouraged or restricted using the word “war” in the titles of cartoons marketed to kids. It’s honestly the most Canadian reason I’ve ever heard for changing the name of something, and I am totally there for it. Let’s be honest: I probably would’ve turned into the real-life version of Megatron as an adult if at a young age, I got exposed to a show with “war” in the title.

Anyway, flashforward to 2007: given my obsession with these wacky waving transformable weapon wielding robots in disguise, when I first saw that trailer with REAL life people interacting with Optimus Prime and the gang, I could not contain my enthusiasm. In fact, as far as I can recall, it was the first time in my entire life I felt genuine excitement for a film after watching the trailer. Even back then, I saw “Executive Producer Steven Spielberg” listed, and I was like, “oh my gosh, this is going to be EPIC.”

Little did I know at the time that Michael Bay would end up going down in infamy as a director mired in controversies (especially pertaining to his creepy antics with Megan Fox). Nor did I realize that most of the subsequent films would contain plot coherence levels on par with a blackout drunk person at a bar trying to argue that “The Irishman” is a better film than “The Godfather” because (and I quote), “it’s newer”. I can’t help but wonder if that same person would rank the live action renditions of “Transformers” in reverse chronological order for that exact reason.

But in that moment back then, twelve-year-old me saw photorealistic visuals that brought some of my favorite characters to life, big explosions, the legendary Steven Spielberg’s name attached to it, and epic looking vehicles transforming into robots. What more could a pre-teen want?

Funnily enough, the whole Megan Fox component did not factor into my decision making back then, as I still thought girls possessed cooties. Looking back on it though, it’s insane how quickly starring in this franchise skyrocketed her fame levels amongst teenage boys (and men in general for that matter I suppose).

Needless to say, back then, I really enjoyed this spectacle. It made all my wildest robot battle dreams come true. Clearly, others thought the same way. It landed roughly $700 million at the box office, which put it comfortably in the top thirty for all-time highest grossing films of the 2000s, along with a top five finish for the year of its release.

With that said, with the Decepticons over at Rotten Tomatoes battled with Autoboot audiences across this new divide (I know this song reference is from the second Transformers film put the tomato launchers away please). Critics put it at only a 57% fresh rating, whilst audiences loved it, giving it an 85% certified fresh rating. Back then, I sided with the latter, but what about now? After all, people’s perceptions can drastically change over the course of twenty years.

Is there more than meets the eyes with this first film installment? Or should this film roll out of our collective memory Autobot style? Regardless of the answer to this question, given the robots’ adoration for a giant cube called the “Allspark” they probably would love to hear a take from hundreds of fruits you can dice into that beautifully symmetrical shape. In case you need a refresher, here’s the plot synopsis of the film:

An ancient struggle between two Cybertronian races, the heroic Autobots and the evil Decepticons, come to Earth with a clue to the ultimate power called the AllSpark held by a teenager (played by Shia LaBoeuf, remember him? The “Even Stevens” guy?). Now…

Without further perspective, let’s get to this retrospective!

As mentioned earlier, the name Michael Bay does not exactly spark the most positive word association in most film circles. The man’s filmography spans back to 1989, but despite a lot of commercial successes over the years, critics eventually coined to the term, “Michael Bay-esque”, a pejorative meant to signal that a movie prioritized loud explosions over coherent plots. Not to mention the accusations of misogyny, feuds with actors on set, along with his propensity to incorporate offensive racial stereotypes. His response to all of this?

“I make movies for teenage boys. Oh, dear, what a crime.”

Despite all of this, nobody can deny that Michael Bay’s chaotic, sensory overload style of filmmaking influenced a lot of modern cinema we see today. What can I say? People (myself included) love their popcorn flicks.

The million-dollar questions are the following:

1. Does “Transformers” do anything to buck the typical Michael Bay trajectory?

2. Do the stylistic components he prides himself on still maintain their magic?

As we all know, visuals and explosions can lose their luster over time, as they get displaced by newer, more up to date animation upgrades. I remember when interviewing the fine folks over at Onyx VFX, they noted that decades ago, people gave grace to CGI in film because they knew the tech wasn’t there to create photorealistic stuff. But that no room for error exists these days are sky high due to all the tech advancements in the field.

Fascinatingly, the visual effects in this STILL electrify. Part of it stems from the fact that they partnered extensively with the U.S. Department of Defense and multiple branches of the U.S. military (Army, Air Force, Navy, and Marines) during production. This allowed for them to utilize a ton of real aircraft, tanks, and other important military components that add authenticity to the battles. Not to mention all the crazy explosions using practical effects. All the fight scenes feel incredibly immersive as a result, even if the crazy cuts in the editing can make you lose track of what’s happening sometimes.

Even the CGI on the robots blows my mind with its attention to detail. After watching the film, I looked up whether the film I watched underwent a re-mastering in this department. It turns out, that much like the “Pirates of the Caribbean” franchise, they never needed to do one because of its quality. It especially comes into its own when transforming from robot to vehicle, and vice versa. They make those transitions look as smooth as silk.

Take a look for yourself on this matter. You can see not only so many intricate details woven together, but also wear and tear.

The only aspect technically that fail to hold up revolve around any HUD interfaces and computers. Those pieces when making appearances give us sobering reminders that the film came out almost twenty years ago. That along with certain sound effects. All things considered though, visually, almost everything holds up incredibly well.

Alongside the top tier visuals, the score deserves some serious flowers. Steve Jablonsky brings a “larger than life” feeling to this amplifies the emotions of every encounter his tracks make an appearance. The decision to use angelic harmonies adds an otherworldly component to everything, giving a spiritual vibe that beautifully captures the essence of intergalactic robots coming to Earth to save the day. His music goes BIG, but does not go home. It involves a massive orchestra featuring taiko drums, military snares, and electric pulses, blended with unique ethnic and modern electronic synth elements. The main motif with the massive crescendos followed by the beautiful chorus singing left an immediate impact on me well after re-watching this. I wish the subsequent films used his tracks more.

Some of the stylistic components hold up, but what about the acting and writing?

Let’s start with the acting. It’s…. Underwhelming to say the least, with a few exceptions. For example, Peter Cullen’s voice for Optimus Prime is legendarily iconic. Anthony Anderson as one of the side characters uses his great comedic timing to get some genuinely heavy laughs out of me. John Turturro shows one instance of good acting in an attempt to salvage an otherwise horribly written character (which I will get to in a bit). Shia LaBoeuf, who plays main teenager Sam Witwicky, showcases some genuine panic that appears authentic in the moments of chaos. His Mom, played by Julie White, also makes me laugh with the ditzy persona she develops.

I remember growing up, the discussion over Megan Fox’s character Mikaela ranged from “she’s a completely unnecessary character” to “she’s so hot”. Funnily enough, I never heard discussion from my social circles on the following question: how was her acting performance?

To be blunt… It’s pretty wooden. Her line delivery comes across as if she’s straight up reading a teleprompter at times. I hate to go all tinfoil hat conspiracy theorist, but I cannot help but wonder if they didn’t cast her because of her acting abilities…. I wonder why they casted her in that role? After all these years, I guess we’ll never know…

Although the chemistry between her and Sam Witwicky (played by Shia LaBoeuf, remember him?) lacks any kind of magic, it captures the high school awkwardness aspect from time to time. However, it remains unclear if they intended to convey that.

All in all, the cast is pretty widespread, so if I missed anyone, it’s because they did not leave much of an impression on me. The only other person I can think of is Josh Duhamel, who plays an important military soldier. While he comes across as sympathetic, the writing constrains him big time from showcasing any real range. In a nutshell: most of the acting is stilted or constrained by the underlying writing behind their character.

Naturally, in typical Michael Bay fashion, the plot falls apart under the most basic scrutiny. We see very little, if any character development from anyone, the main character is pretty bratty, making him not the most redeeming individual. He does some heroic stuff by the end, but I wouldn’t call what he had a meaningful “arc” by any stretch of the imagination. While some of the individuals in the film serve as fun comedic relief (like the parents), they’re not particularly interesting individuals that I feel invested in. They’re more like absurd caricatures as opposed to real people.

By far the worst character is the “Sector 7” agent I mentioned earlier. Despite overseeing the most classified operation in the US government, he’s woefully incompetent, unhinged, and downright inappropriately creepy. For instance, when unveiling that the love interest, Mikaela, a junior in high school likely under the age of eighteen, is actually a criminal who spent time in juvie (which by the way, why is a Sector 7 agent aware of all of this?), he goes “she’s a criminal, and criminals are HOT” along with implying she wears a training bra. It blows my mind that this all made the final cut, and not in a good way. What follows is also equally insane. She makes him take his clothes off and hand cuffs him. I’m not kidding, this happens.

They try to shoehorn a debate on human nature and whether we as a species deserve preservation, but it never delves past a surface level. In fact, it feels more like a case where the writers went “we need an additional moment beyond the battle of the Allspark to justify the conflict between the Autobots and the Decepticons, quick come up with something, ANYTHING” as opposed to a genuine intellectual discussion amongst the screenwriters.

My biggest takeaway from the film is the following: that intergalactic armored robots from outer space with advanced weaponry drive American made vehicles, and American made vehicles only. Sorry Toyota, I thought about buying one of your cars, but then I re-watched this film, so it made me reconsider. After all, who these days DOESN’T base their life decisions off what happens in Michael Bay movies?

That’s not to say the writing is a complete miss. I like that they do not try to take themselves too seriously. There’s a self-awareness here that they lean into which makes for a fun viewing experience. This approach allowed them to write some genuinely clever lines in there that make me laugh WITH the film. The quip below is hilarious:

“You said the car picks the driver”

“Well, sometimes the car picks the driver with a cheap a$% father”

Any fans of “Transformers” will appreciate the moments interspersed throughout where they cleverly use the line “more than meets the eye”. There’s probably other Easter Eggs like that I am missing as well.

Although certain bits they set up are tasteless by today’s standards, others are genuinely hilarious. Like I mentioned earlier, all the scenes with Anthony Anderson send me into the stratosphere, especially when he yells “SHUT UP GRANDMA DRINK YOUR PRUNE JUICE” immediately after telling his friend she is intruding on his place of Zen. Credit where it is due: they take some bold swings on the comedy front that veer more on the absurdist side of things. When it connects, it’s a home run. But when it doesn’t…. Oof.

I’ll add a few more silver linings to all of this so we can close on a positive note: the end scene with Optimus Prime’s narration about his observations of humanity coupled with the buildup to the chorus of “What I’ve Done” by Linkin Park still hits home in the same way it did when I watched this as a twelve-year-old. The editors, music supervisor who chose the song, and to some extent the writing of Prime’s monologue deserve serious commendation for the final scene. It stands up well all things considered.

I also like Bumblebee and Optimus Prime. How could you not? Bumblebee is a loyalist with a troubled past he seeks to overcome, while Prime is a virtuous sage who wants nothing but the best for humanity. Out of the what feels like a hundred characters in the film, they probably possess the most depth of any of them.

All in all, if you’re looking for a fun popcorn flick with great music, awesome visual effects that mostly still hold up, decent action scenes, and some comedic moments that will genuinely make you laugh, “Transformers” is worth a re-visit. With that said, if you’re looking for anything remotely meaningful on the writing, acting, or character development front, I would avoid this flick like the plague.

Put simply: it’s a Michael Bay film. You can take any which way you would like. Which brings us to the question you clicked on this to find the answer for:

Does “Transformers Stand the Test of Time?

The Verdict: For the most part no…. BUT some of the visual effects hold up surprisingly well

Hundred Tomatoes Score: 60/100

TL;DR Verdict: A fun visual spectacle with some heart pumping action, a great score, and some genuinely funny moments featuring superficial characters, wooden acting, and a plot that is absurd in its premise, but contains flashes of cleverness.